My t self discloses minimally. It bothers me sometimes but I remind myself that the more self disclosures, the more I’ll be prone to transference or emotional dependency. I know the relationship is important so it gets confusing When it’s so one-sided. I do think a little self disclosure (not vulnerability) is necessary for a lot of people though. It would be difficult to be vulnerable with an “empty shell” of a therapist.

Without really knowing much about my t, i am learning to trust her by her actions and what I see and feel to be true. I know she genuinely cares about me as a human yet holds that care within a safe therapeutic boundary for my sake. That’s what I need. May not always be what I want (cuz admittedly, sometimes I do want that intimate personal two-way relationshipthat I know is unrealistic and harmful) but its not what I need from my therapist.

Have you ever mentioned to your t that her blank slateness impedes your therapy? If not, maybe bring it up to her and find out if she’s willing to be a little more open, and/or why she uses that approach. If what she’s doing doesn’t truly benefit you, can you look for another therapist that will better match your needs?