I know this seems petty but it’s affecting my life negatively. Im a woman that just turned 52. This problem has been affecting me for about 3 years. The problem is that I think I’m old to the point where my mind keeps thinking “what’s the point?” I run my own business - I’m an artist that deals with a lot of young people (adults in their 20s and 30s) day to day and it seems to make my problem worse. I’ve wondered to myself ‘why do they want to even deal with a creepy old lady like me?’
I’m one of those “young” aging people in the sense that I get along well with younger people. I still dress the way I did 20 years ago, I like to stay fit and partake in extreme workout programs, and having been a musician all my life, I still play (guitar, bass, drums, and sing, write/compose) and love music. I “feel” young in my spirit and even in body, buy my mind keeps insisting I’m old and life is pretty much over. I’m not suicidal - but that last sentence I just shared is really taking my existence over ... I’m old and my life is pretty much over.
I see a lot of people my age living their lives and I don’t see them as old - so why do I have this overwhelming dread in my own?

Just kind of hoping someone out there can explain to me why I have these thoughts and feelings and might have some tools I can use to change my mind and see the rest of my life as worth enjoying rather that spent in a state of surrender to old age.

Thank you.