You ever have those moments when the smallest things just tip everything over?

For me it's the winter time when our apartment has mice infestations. I'd just like to know what it's like to live in a nice apartment, you know?

I'm going to try to keep the apartment as clean as possible, specifically the kitchen and my room. The problem is that whenever my grandma cooks, the kitchen ends up in a complete mess. She doesn't wash the spoons, forks, pots and pans, etc. She doesn't clean anything. The stove is dirty after she cooks. No matter how much my mom and I clean, it just becomes a mess the next day.

I hate mice. I hate the fact that we have mice infestations during the winter and roach infestations during the summer. I hate the fact that my mom never calls our landlord to deal with the problems because she is so passive (and if I call my mom won't be happy).

I hate everything in my life right now. Nothing is going right (still unemployed after more than a year of looking so I can't move out) and now I have to deal with mice. Last year it got to the point where they were running on my mom's bed.

I just wish I knew what it was like to live in a nice and clean apartment.

Besides that, my home situation is just getting more and more tense. I've been trying hard not to cry but my life isn't great. I don't want to seem like I'm grateful but I am just very tired.

Very very tired.