My son is 22 - will be 23 in January (if, in fact, he is still alive).

He was 3-years and 8-months-old when I last saw him. Because of his smarts and activism he was easy to track using Google.

He did get his masters in May 2017 and he did work for the government of South Africa previously, so he could be there or he could be working on his PhD.

His mother is not to be found. She would not, in any case, divulge his current location. She would not - even if I could find her - divulge whether he was dead or alive.

So... I do not know this young man. I am not certain that he is my biological child but I did parent him for almost four years. We share no features - we are both taller than usual - and he actually looks like his mother’s previous boyfriend. I had been in the habit of sharing my heritable diagnoses with his mom but she didn’t seem to care and made it impossible for me to find her. So, maybe he’s not my child (explaining why my diagnoses would be of no concern) or maybe he went batshite crazy and had a heart attack. If the latter, it might suggest that he may be my offspring.

Yet. He really looks more like Tom than me.