I wouldn't mind revisiting any of the years between 3-31, except perhaps ages 14-15. I had severe episodes at that time. I had episodes frequently in my 20s, but the episodes of depression and/or anxiety were fairly short and easily forgotten. I actually had more hypomania, mostly elated and productive, with some anger outbursts. I just thought that was me. I brushed off any negative ramifications. And there certainly were some. You learn to do that.

I did surely have 2 periods in my 20s that reached full blown manic. Luckily I didn't suffer too bad of consequences. Actually, they were the most adventurous times of my life. The full blown didn't last more than a couple months max, but was sometimes preceded by long periods of hypomania.

After 31 it started to get very ugly. Too many years untreated properly caught up with me. Multiple hospitalizations and IOPs. More full blown manias came and lasted, but were mixed more than elated and sometimes psychotic. Depressions lasted longer than ever. Alcohol abuse exacerbated the issue, then strange crap happened on top of it all like phobias, agoraphobia, musical hallucinations, dissociation. Only in the last few years (43-46) has life improved again.

When I say "revisit", just the most positive highlights. I wouldn't want to be away from my husband for too long. I wouldn't want my fate to change if it meant never being with my husband. I'd live the hell all over again if that was required to be with my husband.