(Sorry in advance for any TMI)
My husband and I are trying for our first baby, I am 37 yo and he is 35. I have been on 200mg Lamictal for a few years now (as well as Lexapro which I am still on for time being). Have been off seroquel for a while. Diagnosed as BP-2 but I am really uncertain of that diagnosis. I suspect hormones and moods are at odds.
I tapered over 1 month down to 100mg where I am at present. It is already apparent that things are not good. I used to suffer from "rage" attacks, which subsided for a while this year finally.. only to rear its ugly face already 2-3 times in the past mo. I did notice that the moods were almost exactly timed with major hormone flux related to my monthly cycle (hence my suspicion i may have hormone/pmdd possibly pcos..). I also suffered a chemical preg last month, as I have been monitoring closely and had a faint + just before my P started. We just started trying.
I am working with a new Psych NP since we just moved as well. She is very good and open minded. I have stayed on Lexapro 10mg, and am wondering if that is contributing to my attacks. As when I started on Prozac a few years ago, it was very activating to me, and that is what i mostly suffer from. Being over active, 'mania'ish, rage/anxiety attacks, yelling, breaking stuff. Exhaustion the next day & depression which usually lifts on its own in a day or two.
The reason i suspect hormones at play is exactly the say time of the month (just before my Ov) last mo, I freaked out on my DH, and again, this month. (perhaps full moon didn't help). :/
Now that we are trying for a family, we are both on edge re: my moods. I understand his concerns. Last night my freak out related to his concern about me eating Ice cream religiously. Last night, i did not. And then when i mentioned wanting some, he mentioned that he was proud of me for not having any. Well, that triggered a massive over-reaction on my part, which concluded in me breaking a glass on the counter, and lots of nonsense drama. It affects every bit of my being. Thankfully I dont have to work out of the house today. I am so exhausted.
Yet, the thought of having a child is so exciting to me, i have been waiting and waiting and want this to be right I am going off the meds for this baby. I want to do all I can. I do not want to be on Lamictal during pregnancy. That is something DH and I both agree upon as well as my NP.
Its very hard as I was doing really well this year.. I am not going to get too discouraged. I am just frustrated, feel like an outsider, worry I might not be a great mom b/c of my moods.
On a positive, I see how I am doing something about all this, vs my parents/mom who have mental illness (i greatly suspect) and did not take any action.. i am getting help, i have a team, and a wonderful therapist.
I was reading an article which struck a chord: Hormone Imbalance, Not Bipolar Link:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...polar-disorder and am wondering if I might try this approach which mentioned Wellbutrin helping in the cycle. Perhaps this is the wrong forum for this question- but if any ladies here found relief for hormones w/ Welbutrin? I believe this is also safer during Pregnancy.
thank you for any info. sorry if this is all over the place, i am not exactly very fit this morning.
