Hey estellanomore,

It sucks to hear what you are going through. I think a big part of this is "my love does not feel seen."

I think you are wishing for some kind of response he's not providing for you. It sounds like he is acting almost indifferent to your feelings, like they're somehow not even affecting him and that can be really jarring, maybe his (apparently) "above it all" attitude relative to you is in part providing you with this frustrating sense of not being seen and maybe that is contributing to your transference feelings. I think you are trying to understand what effect you have on him and he's somehow not responding to that need or not even picking up on it. Sadly this really seems like your T himself could be a big part of the problem.