You know whats worse than having bipolar
Is NOT having a close supportive network of.....well someone.
I live all alone & it's HELL!
I'd give anything NOT to live this way.
Now in the past I've tried the following:
volunteering- I ran into people who were so insensitive & uncaring
martial arts-a bunch of ego maniacs + I've encountered bullying both from a student & the owner/instructor
No one checks on me nor cares & I'm getting plenty mean & bitter over it.
Last night I had a major bad night when I was left stranded when a cab didn't show up & the cab driver just DIDN'T CARE. It was 38 degrees, I was so embarrassed.
I just don't have any support. My Mother is cold. In fact colder than the 38 degree weather. I want to break up everything in the house or in my case the apartment.
Life sucks for me.
I even tried calling that stupid veterans crisis hotline oh boy was that a major mistake I'm having a mental illness crisis & the broad on the other end keeps asking me if I want to commit suicide. All I wanted was someone to talk to. Got a thick headed one I guess.
I'm trembling all over & I'm really angry. Deep breathing doesn't help. that was what the lady on the other end of the crisis line kept asking me.
I even feel forgotten on here.
I'm really trying but it just does not seem good enough.