I'm 18, yes. But my insurance goes through my mother. So any doctor I go to visit, and any prescription I obtain will be brought to her attention by way of paperwork at least at some point. She will NEVER let me forget that I needed help if she knew.

I'm trying St. John's wart. so far it's not having any negative effects...that I've noticed at least. I have 2 xanax...took one...calmed me down but only for maybe 4 hours if even that. A good friend of mine says she has lithium and that she will let me have some if and ONLY if I prove to her honestly that I won't abuse them and that I am not suicidal at the time. Right now...I can't guarantee that I will meet both criterion at all times. blahhhhhhhhhhhh I just want to feel better why is it so hard.