" I use transference as my confidence - for big things or small things. I can stand up to other people because i know my t is standing behind me, supporting my decisions."

I am not questioning that you use it for this = but this sort of thing is exactly why I do not understand anything about how most people use therapy. I don't know how it even comes up for you. The last being I would use for standing behind me supporting my decisions (and I don't know why I would want someone to do that to begin with) is a therapist. I do believe, from their literature, that is how a lot of them see themselves.
I doubt I have ever had any sort of positive transference for any therapist.