I'm sorry to hear about your friend too. I'd be worried about a non-responsive T, even without having experienced something that traumatic - but knowing your history, it's really a shame that she didn't respond more promptly.

I also prefer email (and generally try to pick Ts that are OK with using it). Email is my preferred way of communicating... but sometimes I've had to adjust. (My sister, notably, does not check email anymore - she only texts. I send her texts, from my email!)

I just wanted to chime in to second the idea that, if you don't get a response via email - it can be helpful to make a followup phone call. Just in case... just in case your T saw it, couldn't respond in the moment, and then it slipped down in their list; or just in case their email is down, or they're locked out of their account, or they can't access it for some other reason. Things happen... sometimes emails don't get delivered (it's true, I've seen it! They literally got lost in cyberspace!)

But, I understand the anxiety. I get like that too!

Do you think it would help to jot down notes before you call? This helps me... I make a little outline of what I want to say, and I make sure that I have any details written down, so I don't forget or mess them up (like, I might write down the date that I emailed the T and the date of the appointment that I'm rescheduling, and I usually write down my own phone number, because oddly enough - I can get confused about it!).

Good luck. This seems like it should be something that you and your T can work out. If she's good, I think she'll admit that she screwed up, show that she understands why that would be scary for you, and apologize.