I am kind of afraid to flat out ask what my diagnosis is. My physical health is not that great but they cannot pinpoint what is wrong, I really don’t want to hear another ‘we don’t know’ about my mental health. The diagnosis of schizophrenia also does not sit well with me. I never really believed my bipolar diagnosis I remember even asking a couple doctors if I was being diagnosed at bipolar because it seemed to be the go to diagnosis at the time.

Schizophrenia but sits weird with me because my (half) sister’s father has severe schizophrenia, while my father, despite being a weird guy, does not have any serious mental health issues...he is so uninformed about the topic he recently asked me how long I have to take these meds before I am cured. If anyone has schizophrenia it should be my sister, not me. I far from wish any hellish mental illness on my sister but she is the one genetically predispositions.

Currently I am holding on the the schizoaffctive possibility because my reaction to antidepressants without a mood stabilizer is exactly the bipolar definition. I first started getting manic from antidepressants when I was 12 after an inpatient stay. Now I am 29 though and right about the age schizophrenia starts showing.