I feel I should point out that, at least according to the sources I have checked out recently, therapy alone, or in combination with medication has been shown to be more effective than medication alone. I have not seen this mentioned anywhere on this site to date (and of course you can't believe everything you read, but it is interesting, nevertheless). I can sympathize with your desire not to hit rock bottom again. I believe I am currently trying to fend off such an outcome right now. I only suggest a second look at sqrlb8's advice. I very much dislike what the medications I have taken have done to me and am doing all I can to avoid them. Whether or not this is a good idea, I don't know. I also found there seemed to be a period of clearing a drug out of my system once I had stopped taking it. The feeling was vague, but there definitely seemed to be some sort of shift in my brain when it was all gone. I dunno, contrary to the events you have described, I am really starting to think I am a true hypochondriac. I hope not, but I've started to wonder.

OT:
Incidentally, sqrlb8, I don't think it is coincidental that I have been listening to an awful lot of loud music lately. I hadn't thought of it in the particular way you mentioned but I see your reasoning and it appears to be an effective strategy for me so far, so thank you for verbalizing it for me.