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Old Dec 11, 2017, 05:36 AM
AquaGuy AquaGuy is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralau View Post
Wow, your euphoric hypo sounds a lot like mine. I often get obsessed with things and they keep me awake. Usually obsessive cleaning is a part of it, planning how to decorate my house (and later spending money on that), researching subjects I've suddenly become interested in and trying to find all the possible information about that.
I may become interested in new activities that I normally hate. That includes listening to music I have hated before, cooking and baking, trying new recipes (I'm definitely not a person who likes to cook) and then inviting friends to my house to taste these foods I have made. I usually become oversocial, I make phone calls if I can't reach my friends, and when I can reach my friends I spend so much time with them all day everyday that they become tired and start avoiding me. But the crave for social situations will not end, being alone causes a huge anxiety and that's when it's time to make some new friends - usually at bars. Other things that help for this restlessness and "anxiety due to lack of social situations" are, well - being obsessed with something else, like cleaning or shopping impulsively.

Other signs of my hypomania have been some kinds of oversensivity: visual and emotional ones. When I go to a store and see fruits, they aren't just fruits anymore: all the bright colors like orange and yellow make me want to buy the fruits even though I am allergic to most of them. Music sounds awesome, like something heavenly, lights look blinding, not in a bad way - all the lights are just so beautifully overwhelming and I can't get enough of them. I start laughing and crying very easily, more easily than normally. Cute things make me cry, and even my own thoughts can cause bursts of laughter. My friends call me creepy when I start laughing at my own thoughts in the middle of a silence.

I also believe that I am or will become something great, I have plans that will make me famous and I feel more important than other people. Few times I have felt deeply connected with other people and with the universe and some higher powers. The feeling was so strong, it felt like a warm hug, like all the beauty was surrounding me and nothing bad could ever happen to me. Like the whole world was on my side, supporting me. Once I even slightly thought, that I was a reincarnation of an artist that died a long time ago. I thought I was going through his feelings and had his talent. But I am also creative when I'm not high and I have liked painting and drawing since I was a child.

In my euphoric hypos I love the neverending beauty the most. Also love the confidence which makes me feel smart and important and more active socially, because normally I am kinda shy and have low self-esteem. The confidence is something amazing, like, you don't care about what other people think - of course it can also make you act like a jackass.
Holy crap, a lot of that sounds unbelievably like me. Perhaps I do experience some sort of hypomania then, only it might be mild-hypomania because what you describe, and what others have described, sound exactly like me but to a much more severe degree. I can control my impulses, although I do sometimes have some trouble with it, and I do become more social sometimes but I know that people don't like it when I have an episode so tell myself to avoid people and just take out my energy on talking to myself while doing as many active things as possible, even just jumping up and down.
Everything just seems so much brighter, sounds sound clearer, I can like things I wouldn't normally and it feels so unbelievably amazing I try to do about a billion and 1 things, jumping from researching one topic to the other obsessively, I start projects, begin obsessing over them for about 1 hour and then abandon it to start something else and the cycle begins. I have to write down every single thing I think of before my thoughts change again so I can come back and see what I thought of a while later.

I wish I could feel like that all the time, to be honest, but it never lasts long. I either crash into a mild or fairly bad depression or just level out back to my baseline mood, and then I get taken off guard within a few weeks or sometimes a few months when I crash deeply when everything becomes the opposite, everything just becomes muddy and dismal, and I become really anhedonic, sleepy all the time, but I get by with reminding myself it won't last.
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