I have been excited to get back home and post to this comment all day. As I stated about 13 hours ago, I have a story to tell regarding this subject. I talk and type to much so I am going to skip all the info I have put else where on this site to try and help me be some briefer.

I have one sibling. A younger brother by almost 2 years, 20 months to be exact. My brothers name is Terry. Terry was born Aug 28th 1956 and he was born into some very serious health problems right away. Terry was an RH factor baby and his blood had to be exchanged right away.

This began a life of severe cardiovascular health issues for Terry. He had to have many operations during his young life re-routing blood vessels.

Terry and I began drinking about the same time although we did not begin drinking together nor were we ever drinking buddies. I suppose I always had some sort of chip because we grew up on a farm and I always had to work hard and Terry being sick, never had to do anything. Our father died when I was 8 and Terry was 6.

Right away I knew that Terry was an alcoholic. He was everything I thought an alcoholic was and would be. With his first drink, Terry began causing all types of trouble which spread to the family and law. Terry was finally kicked out of school, wrecked many dozens of vehicles, his license was not suspended but REVOKED. I know that I got Terry out of jail myself 20 times by the time he was 20. Soon Terry began the cycle of getting kicked out of the house and he would simply find another member to live with, a grandmother for 3 months, then an aunt for 3 months and he learned to go through a circle only to sooner or later begin it all again.

This was primarily in the 70's and I remember someone coming up with a really cute buzz word called "Tough Love". I embraced that phrase and convinced myself that I loved my brother so much that I would "Tough Love" him. I began to withdraw from my brother convinced that he was a hopeless alcoholic and of course, that I was far above that kind of life. My brother never really worked. I went to college, had a great job, a house, a wife, children...... A life.

As all the many years passed, nothing ever really changed. I thought I knew everything about alcohol and alcoholism but the truth is, I knew absolutely nothing.

June of 1995 at 10:00AM on a beautiful sunshiney Saturday I got a phone call that told me my brother was dead and that I needed to travel to another town and go to the morgue and ID him. My brother had bought an 18 pack of Bud Light the night before, went to a party in another town, passed out on a couch and later that night, vomited and strangled in his sleep. It is called afixiation.

I knew this was such a big event that the news papers would write about my brothers untimely death. I later learned that town coroners pick these up every day and to put it blunt, I learned that no one seems to care much about a dead alcoholic.

I had to bury my brother. He had 97 cents in his pocket when he died. I remember being terribly angry at him when I stood next to this grave. Why couldn't he just have been like me! Work during the day and drink at night.... responsibly....

(I am going to finish this in another post since it is getting long).