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Perhaps there are some realities about me, and about the world, that I don’t understand or “get”. And – because I’m a throw-away person? – nobody is cluing me in, telling me “like it is”, at least as they see it.
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Do you tell others like it is when you understand the expectations or rules of a situation when they don't? I think it is a very difficult things for adults to do, unless there is a specific educational/vocational dynamic in place. "Educating" adults in this way is not a therapeutic exercise and so I am not surprised that therapists have been reluctant to undertake it; what would the consequences be if they gave you a bum steer (which they inevitably would)?
I think it's a categorical mistake to assume that others understand the rules. Most people are bumbling their way along, getting it wrong and getting hurt along the way, because the rules are often arbitrary and subjective.