Quote:
Originally Posted by QuietMind
I hear you on transmuting anger (valid anger!) into numbness, TR. I'm like that with my parents and abuser brother since I live in the same house with them still. Expressing the anger, in however small a way, would get me into trouble so I turn it into numbness or self-harm.
Are you able to feel anger in a safe space such as with your T?
|
We have talked about me being angry in session. Expressing it and voicing it as anger, without being pushed to the very edge of my control, is something that I can't seem to do.
Last week I was talking about my mom and how she makes me SO angry. My counselor made the comment that I didn't sound angry in the least bit. He was talking about my tone of voice and what I was saying about it.
What's ironic is that I was so mad internally that I was seeing silver sparkles on the outside of my vision. I looked that up and its a sign of your blood pressure shooting up very high.
So I WAS angry and internally felt it, but to my counselor he saw no anger.
Seems to me right now that that is a learned protective skill.
I wasn't allowed to be angry when I was young either. I guess I adapted.