When I come in and sit I usually don't know what to say (T never asks first).
So I usually think "Damn, it's happening again, I have nothing to say, I have to say something! It's therapy, I need it, I have to talk to recover! I'm wasting time!"
And finally I say something not very important, it depends on the day:
- how exhausted/sleepy I'm
- that I don't feel like doing therapy today
- that I had a dream
- or about some other events which I think are not important enough for the therapy.

Then there is a silence from time to time.
And I'm getting frustrated that I should talk about emotions, family, childhood and other important things and not stupid work events.

Sometimes finally when half of the session is over I start talking about more important things, feelings, my deeper thoughts. But usually I feel tense at the beginning which also sucks.

Then it's the end and I feel bad that I didn't use the whole session for things that matter. But sometimes when I feel calmer and it's easier to talk I'm happy after the sesion