I have an appointment with my gyno tomorrow and I'm getting anxious about it for two reasons, and these two reasons coincide with each other. Basically, I've been avoiding going for at least 3 years now because I somehow am super anxious about when he uses the speculum for the pap smear. That device has somehow become the source of a great amount of anxiety for me. I know it's more so me making a mountain out of a molehill, but just the thought of having that thing inside me, spreading me to an uncomfortable diameter, well, it makes me tense up thinking about it. I don't think any woman really enjoys that.

I know I need to go, if not for the pap smear, but to set up a date to get my Merina IUD replaced. I've had my current one in for at least 6-7 years now, and I know I'm way past due to get it replaced. These devices are only good for 5 years at the most.

I am thinking about using the breathing we do in my yoga classes. Just relaxing all my muscles, and focusing on breathing, acknowledging any thoughts that come up and letting them drift on by, one by one. Or going to my happy place (a nice warm sunny beach).

Any other ideas?