Hi! Glad you posted here and welcome to the forums! So sorry to hear of your troubles with your husband. Sounds like things are at their worst. I really don't have a lot of advice on what is wrong with your husband because I don't know all about him except for how he acts in terms of finances and work which is poor, obviously. I once left a man to try and shock him into "sanity" but if backfired on me-he never changed and we never got back together. So, I've learned not to threaten things unless I am willing to go through with them and suffer the consequences (possibly a huge amount of grief). I learned the hard way. Actually, though, my life has improved in many ways without him but I suffered a lot first from the loss. I haven't met another guy yet that I think will be right for me. In my experience people do not usually change unless they are willing to change and work toward it. Often the help of a good therapist will be needed. I hope he will be willing to go. If you really want to leave him for good if he doesn't change, you could tell him that if he does not get help with you that you can't take it any more and will have to leave. And that you need and deserve a better life. That is if you have made up your mind to leaving and will go through with it and can live with whatever consequences may happen. But I must tell you that when I left mine he found someone else. If you still want to be married to him and think there is some hope I would not leave. All I can suggest is that the two of you seek a good therapist and explain your situation and perhaps you can get some answers. I think couples therapy would be excellent so you can work things out together and you can get a good understanding of what is wrong and what needs to be done. It will also help him to see how he is effecting you. Financial counseling may be helpful in addition. I hope you can get some resolve to this and wish you much luck.

<font color=red>HAPPY</font color=red> <font color=green>HOLIDAYS!</font color=green>