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Old Dec 15, 2017, 02:40 PM
Loose Screw x 2 Loose Screw x 2 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: The Depths of Sadness
Posts: 800
Not really but, I/We do have a thing about words that I've never really understood. Like DH who is my dark alter doesn't want anyone knowing or using his name unless he tells them himself and V, a protector personality that we have, I am protective of when it comes to the full name. Only alters of our collective may call V, by their real name. If anyone on the outside finds out or even worse tries to use it, we will have to change it to something else. As far as calling things something different than what their more widely known as I'll do that with things that are personal to me like say someone in my family uses words associated with some form of fetishism then, I can no longer use that word because in my mind it has been tainted or defiled by them and so an alternative word must be used if the interest in that thing is to stay in place. So if anyone in my family finds out what I call V or DH then the name is ruined and must be replaced. A brother once called me by G's name because I'd made the mistake of using it as an email and we didn't like that at all. Nobody is allowed to address us by our secret names unless we tell them what they are. Here is an example I guess. As a fetishist and I like certain types of clothing that women may wear. Not on me but, on them. I like leather harnesses and stuff like that. My brother and I were talking about dogs last night and he mentioned harnesses. Even though he wasn't talking about anything related to sex, hearing him say "harness" was enough to poison it for me so now I have to say "straps" or if I'm with my mate, I might say something like "Okay. Go get strapped up and we'll begin."
I don't like the idea of mentioning such personal things but, it was the best example that I could come up with without digging through my memory banks. I know that it's strange but, I believe that it is connected with whoever abused me and how intolerable the abuse was. It seems to have something to do with self protection or avoidance I feel.