I'm having another anger spell. I really need to go somewhere nice where there is beauty free from negativity.
I don't want to be in this apartment and all this negative energy. I just almost went into PTSD mode trying to do some research on a job training program that has changed.
I'm sinking fast into despair. This is no fun. I have no were to go just yet. I know what my plans are I can navigate myself into another place I won't tell you my trade secrets. Tonight is Sunday the incident that has caused me the trauma only happened a few days ago.
I have no place to go for comfort = that's fine
I'm all alone which isn't okay but I'm doing my best to suck it up = It sucks
I've had to do this my entire life since I was 8 years old = you have a lot of self esteem issues when you are an adult like me.
I came close to screaming, I didn't. I do prefer self harm only not the cutting, I prefer hitting myself over the head.
I am irritable? Sure wish I could visit the ocean in California & eat some lobster.
I wouldn't even care if I don't talk to anyone because everyone in my life has let me down.
I just wished I had some money to do something for ME!