I hear you. I dream of my parents thinking I was special, of my ex staying with me and working out what he wanted, of my kids not questioning me as a mom. And now, it is Christmas and I am supposed to tie all my emotions in a big red bow. When I think what I want, life looks better. I want some good hugs, some good meals, a nice walk, to write and to read. I will walk away when I don't fit into someone's insecurities, it works really well with my ex. When he gets going, I say I am just going for a walk. I am not sure what picture I have with my life, it is not the hall mark one, but I will try and fill mine with passion and life, even if it is just eating Christmas trifle with my fingers.