I'm 24. I've been suffering from depression, eating disorders and anxiety for 10 years now. I have extremely low self confidence and every little trigger makes me want to die. I'm mainly sensitive on social rejection and acceptance from other people, yet I have no social confidence and am very introverted.

I've never gotten a proper treatment for any of my issues. I always quit the treatment too fast. I'd been seeing my psychiatrist for 6 month before I quit the last time, the same about my therapist. The therapy was completely useless because I didn't talk at all.

I've been seeing my psychiatrist on and off for the last 4 years. Eventually I always decide, that I'm actually fine and I don't need this. He never seems to judge me when I come back, but I know it's not ok. I've been switching therapists for a long time. I always eventually feel like they can't understand me or help me anyway, so I always quit. Most of the time I refuse to talk.

I'm like this with everything in my life. I always start something new and quit before it can have any effect. I don't know how to deal with it...

I'm feeling really down. I have very short moments in my life that make me happy. But the happiness always lasts for only few days. After that my feelings just get worse and worse until I usually hit the rock bottom of suicidal thoughts.

I have all the reasons to be happy. I've lately finished my dream university, I have a job, a boyfriend, friends who like me, family that supports me. I have absolutely everything and yet I'm able to feel only the negative feelings and the positive ones are extremely short and very subtle.

I've tried to change my life many times, I've tried therapy, pills, new places, creating schedules, exercise, I'm very artistic and creative, but nothing helps. Nothing can keep me feeling motivated long enough to actually make it meaningful and good for me.

I'm a lost case right? There is no hope for me...