I have this problem, too, and it's especially bad since I'm seeing a new T. One thing that has helped me move forward somewhat is writing things down and giving them to my T. I have disclosed several major things this way. They were things she needed to know, but that I am currently unable to bring myself to bring up. I usually write something, pretending that it's just for me, not for her. Then I take it with me and accidentally-on-purpose give it to T. A bit of self-deception can be helpful in this regard.