I love that song. Yah to BNL. "We've got these chains hanging around our necks, People want to strangle us with them before our first breathe..."

So I saw my pdoc last night. He is such an ahole. He said something like "and you still have no social life/personal life?"... I guess being single must mean I sit alone in the dark every weekend making sweaters out of my cats shedded fur or something...". He can go ****k himself, I didn't realize that being in a relationship was a measure of ones mental health. Bc when dating my addict ex bf I sure wasn't better off...

I asked him about light boxes and bright light therapy and he told me to see a sleep doctor bc that's not an area he knows anything about. Then he said I needed a medscape account to read articles on it, and not to be intimidated by the complicated medical jargon or think only drs and nurses could understand it, bc i would find some good info there. I'm not a fuucking moron just bc of a mood disorder. I was a science major in college who almost went to veterinary school and I have a MS, I thing I can handle reading a fuucking medical journal. Ugh. I cannot stand his condescension. And I think he dislikes me having independent thought and not thinking he is a god. Plus he must feel inadequate that he can't really help me very much. Idk. I wonder where exactly i went wrong in life that I am on the wrong side of the desk.

I'm okay. Less "irritable depression", as my pdoc dubbed my feeling down and shiity and pissed off... whatever. I think the longer I experience being a psychiatric patient the more bullshat it all seems to be. It's like some fake religion i can't buy into. Idk. I guess I'm doing okay anyway. No more intense urge to drive into a bRick wall or punch a wall.

Take care everybody. Sorry I write too much here.