I have to say that your feelings to your husband do not seem very empathetic. Depression is not a choice, yet you talk about it like it is his choice to be depressed when you say it "isn't really my kind of thing." Depression isn't anyone's kind of thing. I don't know anyone who would actively want to feel this way, and it is completely out of my control, and your husband's control, to have depression or not.

Please just remember that this is a mental health forum, and most of us on here have some mental health disorder and MANY have depression. Saying it "isn't really your kind of thing" like it's our choice to be this way is kind of offensive.

On to the other parts of your story: it seems really interesting that the second you were away from your husband you fall in love with the first stranger you meet. And then he also is sick, possibly an alcoholic, and in need of therapy.

It seems like maybe you tend towards men who need fixing, and yet, you cannot fix them (who can?). Maybe it would be good to be on your own and find a relationship with someone healthy. Although it does make me wonder at your marriage vows...don't you vow to take someone in sickness and in health? And your husband is sick with depression? Sorry, maybe that's just my personal feeling on it...I'm not against divorce, if you think it's truly irreconcilable. But I would suggest individual therapy so you do not seek out relationships with new men who need "fixing" too.

Seesaw