I am very confused by your reasoning. And the use of the term “final exit” in your first paragraph.

Why do you believe that your therapist would manipulate you into lying about your well-being? You say she knew that you were not safe. But you don’t really provide any information proving otherwise. You lied and you have to take responsibility for your lie before you can analyze your analyst. Sometimes, we really do tell the truth, you know.

You are suggesting that your therapist would have felt a professional remorse, not responsibility. That’s me running away to the garage and telling my nanny how sorry she would be once I was gone. You close that paragraph saying that you have respect for your therapist but we don’t lie to therapists that we respect and we don’t accuse them of manipulation.

I am sorry that you are depressed. I am also not following your reasoning when you write of depression (‘dark thought’?), hospitalization and pondering the ‘good side’ of having a pretty severe life-infliction and then think that now is a good time to stop therapy.

Yes, you are right. Suppressing (I will not be so bold as to say that I have it beaten) depression is an inside job. But therapists/psychiatrists do more than dole out self-help tools. The best rationally challenge our thinking where it is crooked.

I haven’t any insight how you could have jumped through a flaming ring of professional manipulation and arrived on the side of discontinuing that professional service? At a time when you’re also saying that you are not safe?

I know that I am in disagreement with your introductory reasoning and on to the end. I know that I am discouraging self-help. If you begin with flawed reasoning maybe it is reasonable to think that your conclusion might be flawed, too?