Quote:
Originally Posted by healed84
T,
I was hoping that our session yesterday would help things feel back to normal in regards to our relationship and my therapy in general. But it didn't it just still feels really off to me. and I can't put my finger on why it is that I feel this way. But a big part of me thinks that its best to end it now. I know that we agreed on seeing you once a month, and even though we both think that I am ready to be done with therapy.. it is good to still appointments scheduled with you. And I know that I go back and forth, I want to be done with therapy, but it is scary giving those appointments up.. I just really think that is the way that it needs to be handled. Tuesday I will call the office and cancel all future appointments with you. I may email you after that as a sort of wrap up of everything. After 6 years of therapy, I didn't expect it to end like this, but I think really it is the only way that is going to end.
Overall you have been a good T, and I appreciate the years of appointments, emails, phone calls, and text messages. I found therapy at the right time in my life, and perhaps it may have even saved my life a couple of times. So, please don't take my abrupt leaving as an insult. I think the problem is we built up too good of a relationship, and I don't ever want to leave it. But, therapy isn't meant to last forever, and it's time I move on.
I will miss you! And I am glad that I will at least still get to see you around town for awhile.
Healed
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Hugs, Healed. It sounds like you know what you have to do. It sounded like things have been going poorly with your T for some time now (and even he admitted it, right?) Like maybe it's causing you more distress than helping at this point. Maybe you've just come to the end of your T's usefulness to you--you can't go any further with him. I assume he's the sort who would leave the door open if you change your mind, right? So there's no risk in trying it out, seeing how it feels.
I ended things pretty abruptly with my T of 6 years as well (is there something about the 6 year mark, I wonder? The 6-year itch?), just telling her in session that I'd made an appointment with another T and that I'd at least come back for a termination session. Well, it's now been over 3 months, and I did send her an e-mail update and said I might come in for termination session in February (she's traveling most of January). But I don't know that I'll actually do that--not sure I feel the need, but will see how things are going then. (Still debating what to do about MC at this point, but that's a much more complicated story.)
My point is that I don't think there necessarily needs to be some long termination process, even though T's often seem to think that... Do what you think is right for you, not what your T thinks...