My downs have to come first.

Downs:
-S --my long-term T-- telling he was moving across the country for a new job
-the horrendous and traumatic end to our therapy
-S getting dx-ed with cancer
-S actually leaving
-everything...everything falling apart

Ups
-Finding J...and Group T...and then C..
-Very positive termination with J and transition to working with C
-Finally trusting C
-Going on my cowgirl retreat
-Finding myself again - outside of my relationship with S (exT) - outside of ALL of my relationships, actually
-Therapy no longer being an obsession that takes over my life
-Beginning to securely attach to C
-Finding a sense of security I haven't experienced before
-Successfully transitioning to an ok, but surface-level and "heart-guarded" friendship with S (exT)