The Ativan helped some today. My dr wants me to take it on days I'm off work and then days I work take it after I get off. It makes me kinda sleepy. I feel so pathetic about stress from a job causing me this much trouble. I just can't fail. My therapist isn't sure this job is good for me. My aunt thinks the same. It's a really good job that I am having trouble with. If I need ip I won't get fired or lose my job over it which is a blessing. I don't wanna end up
Ip but I seem to every year around December-February. So far I have made it but idk hoe much my coping skills will keep me sane right now. I'm trying.

I'm starting to have those bad thoughts about not wanting to be here.