Yes, I do, at times, miss loving someone and being loved, and I certainly miss being a team. However, This is the consequence of being single and choosing not to be in a relationship. Do I regret this decision? Not at all because it is a very conscious decision. Let me put it this way:
Every morning, I do my morning ritual (mediation and writing) from 5 to 7am ( although i have been slacking at this due to my intense morning depression). Then, I work 8 to 10 hours. And afterwards, I spend about 90 mins at the gym. In summary, I am usually done with my day around 9pm.
On the weekends, I workout and afterwards do volunteering for about four hours. Or go for a hike or read. Or catch up with cleaning, laundry, etc.
I have dinner with friends once a week.
And, the most important task of it all is to manage my anxiety, depression and behavior. Meaning, my limited energy goes to navigating life and accomplishing the above tasks while managing the constant lack of energy and motivation created by depression and anxiety.
You see, none of the tasks mentioned above are something to be sacrificed or rescheduled. Each task serves a purpose and help me function without suffering more than usual.
However, if I am in a relationship, I might end up skipping my scheduled workouts (even one is too many), or skip my nightly journaling or morning meditation sessions, or cancel dinner with friends or alter my healthy diet habits to meet my partner’s. And, in my humble opinion, any alteration to my routine is a mistake with consequences to my mental health.
The imbalance created by a relationship gives me anxiety. Besides, I really enjoy my solitude. Only a very harmonious relationship can make me consider sacrificing time from my daily routine and solitude.