I rested today,christmas eve,I slept a lot and watched the box...cuddled up to my cats.
I was talking to online friends and pretending to be upbeat and cheerful but really I am depressed about so much.I am depressed about being alone,about being ill chronically and about the fact that I eat crap food even though I have a lot of knowledge about healthy eating,about the fact that I am gaining weight instead of losing it,I am my own worst enemy.
I made it a new year's resolution to lose weight and eat healthy foods,I hope I can stick to it!
There is still xmas day to get through on my own,and Boxing day,though on that day I am going to see a film and have a meal at the pub,both of which I am looking forward to if I have the energy.....and am not too weighed down by indulging on sweet stuff tomorrow.I might avoid sweet junk and just eat savoury.On wednesday I wouldn't be complaining cos my niece is coming we are having a meal and opening presents and I get to spend all day with her,just us on our own.We have a DVD to watch.

It is so good to be on here to have a place where I can vent and be honest about how I am feeling.Tonight I feel sad and lonely that is the truth....I know many people are worse off than me and I should be grateful I am not on the streets out in the cold,hungry...I am thankful for what I have but I feel I need to change certain things in my life before I am truly happy and living the good life on God's path,that is what he wants for me and that is what I want too.

Thanks for reading this and I wish all of you a Happy Christmas and a Very Happy New Year 2018,I hope it brings you every happiness and whatever you want and need.