I thought i had my defenses up, that i was kind and caring but also keeping people at the right distance, that nobody could hurt me anymore....

why does this always happen? any interaction, even the smallest one ends up hurting me. even a paid one (with my T)! im SO tired.

what do i do? maybe i should just let it all go, but why do i always have to let it go? it isnt right, or fair.

and im so tired of feeling so alone, lonely, invisible, hurt, mad and sad. im tired of having a broken heart because of... anyone (IRL)! im tired of hurting because of people. and im tired of my own feelings.