I have that feeling too... every moment of every day. I don't have kids... or grandkids. But I have a wife of 38 years. She has no one else. So I have to keep myself going for her. I've mounted two major efforts to end it all previously. The doctors & therapists I've seen I think presumed I was depressed. But I wasn't depressed. I was PISSED. And at that moment I decided I was going to take care of it once and for all.

My wife & I don't talk either. I presume she's not tired of hearing about it because I never talk about it. But she doesn't understand it & she doesn't know what to do about it nor does she want to. I can't blame her. She didn't sign up for this. I know what you mean about the games. I enjoy watching the British mysteries they show on our local public television station. And while I'm engrossed in one of those, my urgency tends to fall away as well. I'm glad your son was there for you. I wish you both well...