Quote:
Originally Posted by golden_eve
I understand it must be really difficult and painful to feel unappreciated and to not get the love and attention you want and need from your family.
That being said, given your prior post, you are doing SO well in life -- SO WELL! Professorship at a prestigious university, you own your own home, and you came home to help out your parents (which is MOST admirable!!). Sometimes we have to validate ourselves when we don't get it from others that we care about. You are doing right by your family... and that is the honorable thing to do. Your sister sounds a bit less self-reliant and self-sufficient, and perhaps even a bit more selfish since she is not helping. I wonder if your family sees you as the one who is doing well and her not doing so well and that's why they give her more attention? I could be wrong, but it's a possibility. And then there's the unequal treatment towards your former partner and her fiance. That's not right....
My hope is for you to somehow make peace with this situation, as best you can under the circumstances, knowing that you are doing the right things AND that you are secure in your own life and are doing so well.
((((Hugs))))
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Thank-you. What you wrote resonates with me. I do think, at times, my dad has given her more attention because she had had a harder time with things like school and career. It’s not the reason for all of the unequal treatment, but some of it. She has gotten in trouble with the law in the past, and definitely required more attention in that respect.
When I lived on the other side of the country, it was very easy to just live my own life and not be bothered by this kind of stuff. This is the first time I’ve lived in the same state as my parents since I was 18– and now I’ve been in my childhood bedroom for 6 months— and some of that old stuff that I thought I’d forgotten has resurfaced. I’ll move through it, it was just a ****** week. And I tried talking to my dad about it— but he just yelled at me and wasn’t willing to hear me out. So it’s not going to change. Today is my sister’s birthday— and I’m planning her party— so I’m going to go get that off the ground, but tomorrow I’m hoping to get some “me” time. It just sucks that my life and my support people are still on the other side of the country where I lived for the last 8 years.