I'm trying very much to not do what it's saying to do, because I know I'm mixed up, messed up, effed up, and plain wrong to think and feel like this. It's like I'm two persons, but only that one is a mask. It's so weird. I've been flirting relentlessly with someone on FB today, but feeling like dying at the same time, because I know it's never to go beyond FB and couldn't handle the commitment anyway. It would probably be very much a shot at a healthy relationship, which I undoubtedly would screw up from the get go. She's an artist with bipolar too, making her soul very much tortured as well. I've dreamed of her several times before and it's all in very dark black and white with only the color silver visible and very prolific.
I'm not going to be able to have a relationship. I'm not good.
"I've made a mess of mine
And all those around
You think you're so damn cool
You're so damn cool
Don't think about it
Addiction
User or loser
Mind abuser
Don't think about it
Salvation
User or loser
Mind abuser"
Pigface "think (addiction/salvation mix)"
Hard to believe an IDM/trance/rock/metal/dance group could mean so much and yet be so clear about something so serious. This is a supergroup for partying, but their lyrics are almost always swinging and hitting like a champ. If Trent and ohgr3 are involved, it's going to be hard hitting