I always heard there were only 2 ways to respond to bad stuff: Fight or Flight. But then I learned a little while ago that this is incomplete - it should be Fight, Flight, Freeze and Fawn.

I blamed myself so much for freezing during traumatic events, and wondered why I couldn't run away or fight my way out of it. Learning there are 4 F's has lifted a weight off my shoulders.

On Christmas Day, I went to a community free lunch with a neighbour. It was great fun, even though I don't celebrate Christmas. We got a lift home, and the driver gave my neighbour a kiss (she was fine with it). When he approached me, I just could not move. All I could say was "No," over and over again. Luckily he saw how upset I was & backed off. I was disorientated for a bit, but then I felt reassured that this was a normal response - I wasn't a freak who didn't know what to do, or a coward either. I still didn't like what happened, but I didn't blame myself & that's a first or me.