I'm sorry growly. It's something I try not to think about. The other day we were going over a change in schedule because I am cutting back and there was a time she said she could work into alternate weeks with a place she goes to volunteer. And I immediately felt like crap that she sees other people for free and enjoys them so much more. But you know, it's just an old script that's playing, right?

I can't remember how it came up, but she told me once that she had clients she really gets along well with and they have engaging talks, but the client doesn't really do much with their therapy; and she has other clients who don't have the same rapport, but who do amazing work in therapy; and other variations. I think I came away from that thinking that therapy has a lot less to do with the relationship than people say it does. And also, that I am not really anything more than an appointment. I try to remind myself of this and just focus on being well and happy outside of therapy (easier said than done, but it's worth it).