We've hypothesized about why I keep wanting to tell people about stuff like this, and that's really an interesting idea to consider, especially since I'm avoiding telling T about wanting to or being close to having a crisis (and BTW, I've found a convenient trigger, but so far I'm resisting). One of the things we discussed that wanting to self-disclose has to do with wanting to be understood, and to be real with people, and to have a connection with them. Since I view my pathologies as the essential center of who I am, that's what I tend to want to offer as "here's the real me." So T said that at some level my motives were healthy. I don't think there's just one explanation though. I think it's a little of a lot of different things. Part of it is also probably the thrill of taking a risk like that. Well, I never told anyone that I was sane.
Wendy