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Originally Posted by TheSadGirl
Oh I have one. A long time "friend" who assumed that because I was upset with him I must be off my meds. I can't possibly feel emotions unrelated to bipolar. I ended that friendship on the spot.
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Can't blame you there. Nothing makes me mad faster than an automatic "Did you take your medicine today?" any time I'm even the slightest bit in a bad mood.
Quote:
Originally Posted by IA_2809
-"You're lazy. With so many possibilities to get better, why is it that you don't in time? Must be the problem is not your condition but yourself. "
-"You're an economic burden. Worthless, unnecessary, weak and unproductive, you are dead weight on somebody else's shoulders."
-"You're dangerous. You're uncomfortable and triggersome."
-"You need pity and someone to talk to all the time. You're a fragile kid who needs the rest for emotional comfort all the time."
-"You're the way you are because you chose it through your life."
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An ex of mine also had a mental illness. His sister treated him like he was four years old because of it, and then assumed I was dangerous and couldn't be trusted. I was hospitalized after a self-injury. The injury wasn't serious. It was depression I was hospitalized for, and the fact that I was being treated like garbage had a lot to do with it. Anyway, she then told her brother he shouldn't keep seeing me, because if I'd injure myself, I might do the same thing to him if I got mad at him.
And ugh with the pity! Just because I vent about some annoying or inconvenient thing, it doesn't mean I'm "suffering" and "hurting" and need advice on what to do about it. My goodness, other people vent. Why can't I, without getting placed under a microscope and analyzed to death? My brother used to be really bad about that, until I went no contact with him. Sometimes I was even trying to be humorous in my venting, but he'd see it as an SOS, give me all kinds of patronizing and condescending "help," and then take offense when I told him I didn't need it.
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Originally Posted by justafriend306
The assumption about the driving has nothing to do with one's ability. It has everything to do with the fact that many people dealing with mental illness cannot afford to operate a car. For instance, the majority of the people including myself attending support group are on disability. Owning and operating a car is simply a luxury that most of us don't have. To hear of people with mental illness whose lives have not been affected by such definitely would be a surprise. This is no indication of slighting of your capabilities but yes, it might still be insulting.
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Thanks for that. You're saying that assuming someone with MI doesn't drive isn't that they can't do it, it's that they can't afford a car. I notice you're in Canada and I'm in the USA, but there are similarities in the mental health system, I think. Yes, it's true here too that a lot of people with MI are on disability and can't afford to maintain and operate a car.
In assuming that MI = taking the bus, people are also making another assumption, that everybody with MI can't work and is on disability. Only part of that is true for me. I can't work, but I am married to a man who can support a stay-at-home wife, so I am not on disability. I was, until I married him.
In my individual case, it *was* assumed that I couldn't learn to drive a car. Until I met my husband, I couldn't find anybody willing to teach me. If it had been legal, I would have gone out by myself, but the law required another person in the seat beside me, and nobody was willing to do that. Why? Because I have anxiety, and that means I can't handle it.