The ethical thing to do would be for the therapist to refer the client out. There's a great potential, if not a certainty, of boundary confusion and dual relationships. It's just no good. Asking who I would prefer to hear it from is a moot point - because the friend and the therapist couldn't discuss me without violating my privacy. Just because a friend gave the referral wouldn't mean she has any more right to even inquire of my therapist if I am still a client. I think if the friend thought it was necessary to tell me, I would wonder what made her think I needed to know - like is she talking about me? If the T told me, I wouldn't be as concerned, I think, because the purpose of the disclosure would seem clearer.