O gawd I remember times when I was so lonely, I felt like a black hole in the center of the universe, sucking in every little atom of love, no matter how teeny that swirled anywhere near me.

Since I was abandoned 18 months ago, I have zero interest in love and intimacy, and I don't know if I ever again will. I don't know if it's because I've gone through menopause, or if the antidepressant has killed my desire, but after reading these reminders of how painful loneliness can be, I am not sorry that I am this way right now.

I think it is very, very difficult to be young in our society. The media feed us images of "perfect people" leading their "fun" lives. Why do we have to admire? A twit like Paris Hilton? The athletes accused of rape and worse? Love songs are everywhere on the radio, from hard rock to smooth jazz to country. Unrealistic expectations are forced upon us from every direction.

Young people are at stage of their lives where they are forming a self- identity -- and our media hit them with all this BS about how you need to be in a relationship -- and a perfect relationship at that with a perfect person. So of course the message hits very hard because it directly targets a vulnerable area of life. Yes, we all want love, at every age. But let's face it, images of wrinkled old folks being in love are few and far between.

I always did best on the meet market when I was out and about being involved with things I enjoyed doing. It never completely took away the deep ache of loneliness, but it made passing the time more enjoyable and fulfilling, because I knew I was taking care of myself. And somehow that made me more attractive to others.

Best wishes Kat and others for finding the love you deserve.