Quote:
Originally Posted by SalingerEsme
Your T really loves you, and it doesnt stop the pain. We humans are so complicated, that sometimes affection opens the wounds right up. It seems like we here feel your T's love for you shining through your posts, and yet the mechanism inside you that would let you make use of it to feel peace and to feel precious isnt quite working the way he wishes it would. Thank you for sharing your tears with ours- there's so much pain on this forum, but also so much beautiful human curiosity to understand not just one's own experiences but others too. The love is there for you from your T, but it is outside the reach of your tears today.
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I agree that this is a great comment. That TMC's T loves her, but it's so hard to accept... With MC, some of what's been hard for me in the past has been accepting the caring from him...because, like you said, it opens old wounds. It can make you realize things you missed in the past, for example, and so it's like you're mourning for that. New T's acceptance of me so far has also been a bit difficult for me to handle. Like, after I've told him the stuff that happened with MC, why wouldn't he want to run away screaming? Why willingly take on a client who tends to have attachment issues, especially when that's not really your modality of therapy? (he's said MC--who he used to work with--is psychodynamically aligned, while he is not).
And what you said about this forum rings true as well...
