Your feelings come from within YOU. No one has a right to tell you what you can, or cannot feel. However, They do have a right to ask you to control your actions. If your feelings are being expressed in ways that hurt others, and this includes words, then other people have a right to ask you to stop that hurting. A person can feel a whole lot without doing anything.

It is a common misconception that feeling something means you have to Do something about the feeling. Feelings are information about what is going on with you. It's like a language. Look at what it is saying about your situation. You don't have to do everything your feelings make you want to do, That is a choice. But, you Can listen to what the feeling is telling you about what is going on with you, and that is why we have them. They are information, like a radio broadcast from our guts. It would be ridiculous to tell the radio what to say, and it would be equally ridiculous to do everything the radio tells you to do.