Quote:
Originally Posted by L.P.
I'm inclined to agree with Amyjay, on more than one point. I never much had a say about who gets to meet who either. For me, it's either happening or it's not, I have no say in that one. It's actually been a major problem in my life over the last few years. I can't make plans I can't bail on last second or take classes or do movie nights with a friend or anything because I haven't been able to know who would be here on any given moment. The last thing anyone needs is me going to a movie and having a terrified little or violent teenager show up. No good comes of that for me.
But yeah, I think asking around inside sounds like a good idea as well. Then there's the thing to consider to that a lot of times, DID is a covert kind of coping/survival skill, you know? The whole idea of being outed to friends (even friends who know and friends you trust) could be scary just because it's being outed, you know? I know that alone would make me feel incredible vulnerable and exposed if some other me had some friends and was like hey, I want you guys to meet Avery. Not like I could suddenly show up, but you know if I could... I'd feel like people were staring at me and I'd be really uncomfortable with that. But that's me.
That said, it sounds like you have some good, supportive friends, and I think that's awesome. But yeah, maybe ask around inside and see where the hesitation is coming from. Maybe offer some reassurance that no one has to meet anyone if they are not ready. If you have some decent co con going, maybe just spend some time around your friends so that others inside can feel more comfortable and hopefully see that yeah, these are safe people. That's the best I got... take it slow, offer reassurance, and be clear that it is a choice and not a must do. Wishing you well in this.
-Avery
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i don't necessarily get a say either... my alters just kind of front whenever and none of us have any control over it. tho, it's more co-fronting than anything. they rarely if ever fully front.
i have asked inside a bit, and i know a lot of them are interested in getting to know my friends and make friends themselves. we have really bad communication, so talking with each other is really hard, so they don't have many inside friends if any. we don't really have much of an inner world, again, if any.
but i just think i'd benefit from my friends already having associations with some of my alters, especially the ones that tend to show up more often. i can't actually force them to start co-fronting so that they can meet each other, but when they're around, i would like them to get to know my friends. and they want it too, but are just anxious of what my friends will think of them.
both of my friends that i want to meet my alters have said that they'll accept my alters because they're parts of me, but i'm just worried, still... i mean. it's understandable to feel worried, i guess, but i feel like maybe i shouldn't worry so much when i have such nice and supportive friends... makes me feel a little guilty, haha;;
but yeah i'm trying to take it slow, but there's so much just wanting them to understand right away, which i know is impossible, but hey, a dude can dream :/