Yeah, it is difficult to admit to yourself that you SI, and it shows you have courage to post about it here. There are all sorts of distraction techniques posted around designed to help you reduce or replace SI - but basically you have to want to stop yourself. I dont know how long you have been doing it for, but it becomes harder to stop the longer you do it. I began last winter and had a few relapses over the course of last summer, but i have started it up again. I think of SI all day long... and i dont consider myself addicted or anything. it is worth quitting as soon as you can.