I know what you're saying. Sometimes I think it would help me to get a job so I have something to help me stay busy so I can't brood. But, on the other hand, I had to take early retirement almost 4 years ago because I couldn't concentrate, was making terrible mistakes in my work, couldn't remember things, and was having angry outbursts in the workplace. I chose to take early retirement because I was honestly afraid I was going to get fired and didn't want to lose my retirement benefits.

I've been on SSDI for about 3 1/2 years. My SSDI said I was disabled, unlikely to improve. I don't know if part of that is because of my age, or what. I'm 60 years old. My reviews are supposed to take place every 5-7 years. I haven't had one yet.

I think about going to work, but don't want to lose my benefits. And I honestly don't know if I could function. Also, I don't know if my age would work against me. I know age discrimination is against the law, but I think the minute they see your birthdate on the application, they could not hire you because of some made-up excuse.

I know this isn't encouraging to you at all. Good luck to you.