I need connection, but I also need my T's emotions to not take up space in a way that takes away from my emotions.
I also need him to be able to handle his own issues separate from me.
I need him to have boundaries that are clear and don't move around or change without both of us discussing and agreeing to the change.
I need him to be aware of his limitations and not overpromise (e.g., "I'll never leave you").