Thank you.

Yes, I've met with many pdoc's over the years and have one now. But my biggest problem is my personality disorder (AvPD), which isn't something that can really be treated with medication -- although the medication can help sometimes with the resulting anxiety and depression.

A lot of times, the side effects are not worth the minimal relief I get from the meds. I may be starting a new course within a certain time frame if things don't work out. It's rough. Switching can be really tough. Withdrawal is pretty awful.

And most meds leave me rather dead inside, which makes trying to deal with the personality disorder in therapy effectively impossible.

I'm sorry you've had struggles with depression yourself. And thank you for the kind words.